The Red Wall (Part 1A & 1B)

I’m sure you could imagine the look of surprise on his face when he woke up not only on the floor, but also in a octagonal room with a door on each wall. Although Vince had been looking for a change of scenery, this was not exactly what he had in mind. He would at the very least like to know where he was and also why there were no windows. With a sigh, the boy rose. Now if only he could decide which way to go, though he knew the most important thing was getting out of the room. Something felt terribly wrong about being here.

After taking another glance around the room, Vince noticed that this room was more peculiar than he thought even initially. The walls were painted various colors: green here, red there, yellow, purple, orange, black, grey, and blue. Each of the doors appeared to be made of a marvelous chrome, and quite shiny.

Vince headed towards the red wall with a shrug. It seemed just as good as any. He grabbed onto the door handle and gave it a tug, noting that it was surprisingly heavy. Once he got it open, he took a step through and was surprised at what he saw. her and those wonderful green eyes. He turned and looked over his shoulder to find the door he once walked through was no longer there. All he could see was that oh so familiar parking lot, and that terrible black fence.

“Do you think I’m going to get a lot of attention and look cool? I’m getting picked up in a cutlass,” she said. Vince blinked, there was no way he could be here again. “Did you hear me?” Melody asked. “My boyfriend’s picking me up in a cutlass!”

This was it. He couldn’t believe he was back there, that one beautiful day. How much things had changed since then. He laughed out loud. “Yes, I heard you,” he grinned and shook his head. “I think people will definitely look at you, but I’m not so sure you’ll look cool….just funny,” Vince answered. Melody just looked at him, he could see the excitement in her eyes.

(Cue part 1B)

It was actually the first memorable conversation he ever had with Melody. The first of many anyways. Truth was, even at this time Vince thought she was a beauty. He wanted her as part of his life, wanted her to be his, but he knew this Melody was meant for a different song.

He stood and he chatted with her a bit longer about things of little significance, until she had to go. He at least got her phone number out of it.

Vince sat and pondered things for a while before getting up and walking home. That Melody, how amazing she could be. He reached his front door and turned the handle. There he was, back in that odd octagonal room.

If it was strange before, he lacked a word to describe what to call it now. There was no way any of this could make sense. Why did he go back to that day, of all times? What was up with this room and why does he keep popping up here?

His frustration got to him and Vince turned around. The red wall still remained, but the door was missing. He wanted to get back through there. He wanted to get back to her.

Surprise….

Now, as some of you may know. I am employeed at the local library. Well, tonight I come to you all with a wonderful story.

When I was first hired, I frequented the circulation department, but would on occasion get to help out our teen director with a lot of the teen programs. (Since I helped her before I was even hired)

A year later, I’m frequenting the Computer Lab (I’m sure there are PLENTY of lab stories I could tell) and the Teen Zone (room just doesn’t capture the awesome)

Recently, a coworker had an accident. This particular coworker works in the Children’s Department. The department is HUGE, anyways, she recently had a workplace accident that she is recovering from. So she has some trouble walking.

It was decided that I should switch out with her (not a problem, I love her) for the night so she wouldn’t have to be doing so much walking, and could get around at her own pace. Which, is quite a wonderful plan.

So right now, I am in the terror that is the children’s library *cue music*

I’ve been down here a few times before, but today was the first time I ran into trouble.

A person I knew came in, an ex-girlfriend’s older sister in fact. She has two kids with her. She asks if they can get library cards. I explain that they will NOT be able to unless they are with their legal guardians. So , the little darling girl with her didn’t like this response clearly.

WHOOSH!

She vomits everywhere, right on cue. Guess she decided to stick it to the man tonight.

It gets on the counter, the floor. It couldn’t have lasted more than 3 seconds, but the girl was a geyser! She was relentless, she didn’t care what she damaged. She even got it on her brother’s jacket!

You guys probably don’t know me enough to know that I was just like….”whoa…” and kinda looked at it before it hit me what happened. I got pulled out of my comfort space into a land of vomit and child demons.

and then it dawned on me who was going to have to clean it. That’s right. It was me. Heck, I’ve never cleaned MY OWN vomit. Much less someone else’s. Quite an experience. I also don’t know how to work a mop. But by golly, I learned! (Sorry, never got to use that phrase before).

Another note: I went to dump the mop bucket in the toilet, and someone left a **** demon in there! Just two great massive logs of nasty. No toilet paper or anything. I couldn’t help but wonder, did this person wipe? Whatever. I flushed that mess, poured out the mop bucket, flushed THAT mess.

Then I vowed my revenge. (Not really)

but man, was it an experience.

The Red Wall (part 1)

I’m sure you could imagine the look of surprise on his face when he woke up not only on the floor, but also in a octagonal room with a door on each wall. Although Vince had been looking for a change of scenery, this was not exactly what he had in mind. He would at the very least like to know where he was and also why there were no windows. With a sigh, the boy rose. Now if only he could decide which way to go, though he knew the most important thing was getting out of the room. Something felt terribly wVinceg about being here.

After taking another glance around the room, Vince noticed that this room was more peculiar than he thought even initially. The walls were painted various colors: green here, red there, yellow, purple, orange, black, grey, and blue. Each of the doors appeared to be made of a marvelous chrome, and quite shiny.

Vince headed towards the red wall with a shrug. It seemed just as good as any. He grabbed onto the door handle and gave it a tug, noting that it was surprisingly heavy. Once he got it open, he took a step through and was surprised at what he saw. her and those wonderful green eyes. He turned and looked over his shoulder to find the door he once walked through was no longer there. All he could see was that oh so familiar parking lot, and that terrible black fence.

“Do you think I’m going to get a lot of attention and look cool? I’m getting picked up in a cutlass,” she said. Vince blinked, there was no way he could be here again. “Did you hear me?” Melody asked. “My boyfriend’s picking me up in a cutlass!”

This was it. He couldn’t believe he was back there, that one beautiful day. How much things had changed since then. He laughed out loud. “Yes, I heard you,” he grinned and shook his head. “I think people will definitely look at you, but I’m not so sure you’ll look cool….just funny,” Vince answered. Melody just looked at him, he could see the excitement in her eyes.

Just taking a second

I’ve got some good news and some bad news.

Good news is I finally got up off my butt for a couple days, and took a couple hardcore walks. I have to say, this went very well for me. Despite being chased by a dog, I did manage to walk (who knows what distance) and I’ve started losing some weight. I think I’m going to start trying to establish this as a habit for a while. Despite how annoying it may seem at the time, it is rewarding and does seem to be a good habit. Productive to say the least, maybe I’ll use it to see just how much fat I really can lose and then work from there.

Bad news is, I don’t really have too much else to say. Right now, I’m just trying to figure out what to get everyone for Christmas, and that sort of stuff. Especially trying to find a budget for it when I know that my income is all pretty much disposable, aside from the fact that I’m saving up just in general. (or rather trying to)

More good news: Last night I started going through my external hard drive and trying to clean it a bit, ultimately I just fell asleep. Until then though I was doing a pretty effective job. Just have a couple things left to get rid of, I happily deleted anything that hasn’t been used in the last say….year? If not longer in some cases.

Teardrop.

Love, love is a verb
Love is a doing word
Feathers on my breath
Gentle impulsion
Shakes me, makes me lighter
Feathers on my breath.

^Massive attack…wonderful group, wonderful song.

Not completely why I’m here though. Last night, I spent a bit of time with both my girlfriend and (non-blood) brother for the first time in ages. Due to conflicting schedules, that brother of mine and I just don’t get to hang too much as of late. It was nice being around both of them though. If there’s anything I would classify as family right now, it would be the 2 of them. They’ve been around enough to have seen just about every side of me, and still be around. To me, that’s the difference between family and friends. Yes, I have some really close friends as well that I still keep in touch with, but it’s just not the same by any means.

Christina makes me ponder love and everything I’ve ever thought about it. She brings forth the question of “what am I really ready for?” and “what can I really handle?” but I have also grown quite a bit emotionally and romantically thanks to her. I can’t say I’ve become a different person, but she has done a lot to bring out the person I truly feel I am. If it wasn’t a matter of bringing it out, then it was certainly a matter of finding it.

Over the years I’ve done a lot of soul searching, mainly because it’s just hard to get people to stick around, and for many years of your life, your friends and your relationships define you almost exclusively. Eventually however, there comes a time where you must define yourself. I remember reaching that point where I felt it was necessary, but Christina and my brother Wesley gave me the freedom to find such definition.

Wesley, the guy lived with me for a solid 5 months. Without us ever killing each other, or even attempting to. For him to be the brother I never had (when I indeed have 3 brothers) speaks multitudes on its own. We’re not the exact same, but we work which to me is what family is all about. You don’t have to be the same, it’s a bond you develop, and yet it can’t be developed by just any two people. There’s a lot that goes into it. I like to think so anyways.

Well, turns out I have to get going. So I can go home, and hopefully hang a bit with my homies.

Ciao.

Life is worth living

Today, I went and saw a movie. Not just any movie, but one I honestly wasn’t too interested in as part of a program for work. The movie was Cirque Du Freak, The Vampire’s Assistant (I might pick up the book here in a bit) anyways, in it there is a character that was basically giving up on his life. Just because it sucked. Not only that, but I know several people that have a tendency to do that and think that way.

Honestly, I’m one of those people. I’m pretty sure a rather large number of us are. The thing we ignore (or in some cases just don’t realize) is that on its own, life doesn’t have meaning. The only thing that gives it meaning is time. But without a little help, time’s not really that great of a motivator. The most you can get is “well, maybe things will change some day” unless you really get behind it.

Which, I feel is the reason some people turn to religion and get so completely caught up in it. The idea that God has a plan for you, and that God is always by your side, everything that happens to you is part of some big picture, that makes life much more tolerable doesn’t it? I’m not trying to knock off any religious person in any way by the way. Can you say though that your life has value just because God let you live, or it’s part of Gods plan? So is everyone else in the world apparently.

If you can’t buy into religion (I personally can’t buy into organized religion, though that does not mean I don’t believe in a God, because I most certainly do. I just have my own beliefs) then you better buy into something, even if it’s just yourself. Otherwise, it’s hard not to think that your life is worthless. It turns out that you’re the only person that can actually give some worth to your existence.

No one’s asking you to become president, get famous, grow rich, or be the prettiest person in the world. Unless that’s what you want from yourself I guess. What’s my thing? The thing that keeps me going and reminds me that I make my own path?

Right now it’s my Christina. Other times, it’s only me. I understand that regardless of what I do, she’ll care for me immensely, but my motivation to make an effort to become better each day is that I also want her to have the best. If I’m not perfect, then I don’t need to stop moving. Anything I can do that makes either myself happy or her happy is a good thing in my book. If she’s happy, I’ll be happy. That’s just how things work for me.

The other thing that can make or break me is my Playstation 3. The day I got it and Rock Band, this little behemoth became my life. Or rather my life began to revolve around it. They are not lying when they say “It only does everything”, I’ve found a way to incorporate it into pretty much all planes of my existence. (Wait, now I really do feel the need for a PSP…or Aino) a good game can have me feeling awesome for days as can a good movie.

Just anything I can classify as time well spent. There’s nothing worse than wasting time and knowing that it’s only being wasted. When it could be used for anything at all, I’m not sure about everyone else. But I can tell when my time’s only being wasted.

Chances are, if it makes me feel accomplished, or I learned something then it was worth it in some way.

Once again, just my personal take.

Thanks for reading, feel free to comment.

Really makes me wonder

All of these guys that live in the same city, around the same age, get on Myspace and try to hook up with the chicks they find with “hot pictures”. You know, “holla at a gurl”. Today it occurred to me that there’s a pretty good chance all of these guys would be talking to the exact same girls. Which is pretty terrible in its own.

But then you really start thinking about it and the number of girls that get attention from guys simply because of those pictures is fairly alarming, and the number of guys that must contact each of those girls on a day to day basis is much more terrifying.

I’m definitely not a fan of such behavior. Can’t say I was never into “hot chicks” when I was younger, but I never alienated a girl because she wasn’t the prettiest thing in the world. I would however be more likely to try getting to know a girl that I thought was pretty. My requirements aren’t that high though, really even now all I want is a sweetheart (though back then, I would’ve been happy with a attractive girl that was positively cruel). These people are older than me though, I guess wisdom doesn’t come with age. I would just think that people would know better, or at least have more self-respect than that.

I know, I know, it’s impossible to have everyone in the world live up to the same standards, or even to get everyone to strive to make themselves better. I still don’t think I’m better than anyone, except for an older version of myself.

Is progress bad? Is it such a terrible desire to want the absolute best from yourself? I really think not.

But I suppose that’s just me.

Indeed it’s quite depressing

There’s such a surprising number of people that just can’t use computers at all. Probably larger than the number of people that can’t read (especially considering you pretty much have to be able to read to effectively use a computer…but then again, I’ve been on enough forums online to know better). It’s just crazy, I’m personally under the thought that if you can’t use it, you probably don’t need to as you can most likely do whatever you want to other ways.

I mean yeah, I grew up with them. In fact, I learned how to read from playing video games, when my brothers weren’t home to assist me in getting into a game, and my mother didn’t feel like doing it for me, I just learned to do it myself. I know, computers aren’t exactly easier, but they’re also becoming a necessity, so I find it in a person’s best interests to either A) learn how to use one B) Figure out how to do what you want without one. That’s just my personal opinion.

Anyways, life has become a series of unknowns. For example, I don’t know what I want to do to my drumset, I don’t know where I’m headed in the next couple years, and I don’t know how I manage to stay awake around here. I can’t really complain though, i’m not too worried about it just now. I’m just having fun and bringing in a little cash for myself. If only I could control my spending a little better. Not that it REALLY matters just yet.

Unfortunately, I’m going to go now, just wanted to stop in for a bit and speak my mind a little. It would seem as though I’ve been getting less outspoken, which may be directly related to the lack of blogging. Hopefully it will change.

Ciao

Maybe this will wake me up.

It’s been quite a while since I’ve posted, well…anything. I honestly can’t even lie and say I’ve been busy. Truthfully, I haven’t. I’ve had the time, just not the mind for it. I think I reached that point where I was willing to give in to monotony once again, and just sit back and let things flow. It’s not easy trying to lead your own destiny. Not that anything in life is actually easy anyways. I guess in a way, some part of me enjoys the challenge.

I do grow tired of each day’s repetition, the same old people and their same old mess. I told my Christina that I wasn’t the adventurous type while she was, but after a bit of reflection, I realize I’m wrong. I’m just searching for a different kind of adventure.

I think I’ve been just down enough to give up on my personal thirst for adventure. Or to give up on my thirst for anything. It’s sad how easily life can wear a person out. I think this computer screen and air conditioning doesn’t help, I always just get sleepy. Rather quickly as well. In fact, it just makes my eyes hurt. Which doesn’t happen at home. It’s something odd with this set up. Maybe the fact that it lasts 4 hours.

Either way, I am going to make an effort to start blogging again. Can’t guarantee it will be frequently or anything, but I hope so. I’m going to go for quality over quantity, really try to map out this mind of mine some more and actually use it.

You know, be me.

Because if you can’t be yourself then you’re lost.

Now that I’m thinking about it, there will probably be multiple posts today.

21st Century CURE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdjmWtiyaLs

Industrialization has crippled the globe
(Enjoy GeneCo’s day and nighttime formula of Zydrate)
Nature failed as technology spread
(Ask a gentern if Zydrate is right for you)
And in this wake, a market erected
(Buying Zydrate from an unlicensed source is illegal)
An entire city built on top of the dead
And you can finance your bones and your kidneys
For every market, a sub-market grows.
But best you be punctual with making your payments
Lest it be you on the concrete below.

It’s quick. It’s clean. It’s pure.
It could change your life, rest assured.
It’s the 21st century cure,
And it’s my job to steal and rob GRAVES!

So why care for these petty obsessions?
Your designer heart still beats with common blood
And what if you could have genetic perfection?
Would you change who you are if you could?

‘Cos it’s quick, it’s clean, and it’s pure (all you really need is)
It could change your life, rest assured (all you’ve got to have is)
It’s the 21st century cure (all you need is surgery!)
And it’s my job to steal and rob GRAVES!
GRAVES!

[Thanks to Natalie for lyrics]
(from http://www.allmusicals.com/lyrics/repothegeneticopera/21stcenturycure.htm )

Repo! The Genetic Opera. I don’t think anyone really understands how much I adore that movie. I’ve grown to appreciate the characters and music more and more with every watch. It ended up not receiving too much good praise from critics, and it wasn’t very heavily advertised, curses low budgets. However, it is absolutely an amazing movie. The characters are simply awesome. Music’s a plus as well. I have the soundtrack for easy listening in my car now.

So far I’ve done wonderfully at curbing my addiction. In fact, I would say I’m pretty much over it for now. Let’s just hope there’s no relapse.

Now that I’m back at home field, I think I’m going to have to work on further developing my charm. Since it would appear I at least have some sort. People tend to tell me that I’m “different” from other people. But not in the sense that I’m crazy either. Just some sort of refreshing. (guess they’re the crazy ones right? ) but it does make me feel nice knowing that. Makes all of those odd phases I went through during high school seem a lot more worth it. The whole feeling alone because I just didn’t agree with everyone else’s thinking. I never felt bad about it, but it did make me miserable.

I like being different.It adds to my value.

Anyways, gotta go. Shift’s about over. Ciao!